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Applying to NED? These tips may save your life!

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Ever wondered why people who manage to get admission into NED University of Engineering and Technology (NEDUET) have a certain kind of ecstasy in their eyes? As if they have conquered the world, or at least part of it? I used to ponder over it as well, until I too became a part of the university’s legacy. Recently I decided to apply for admissions in NEDUET. The days that followed saw me transforming from a lovable creature to someone full of loathe and hate for the institute’s administration. Standing in lines for almost seven hours, with an additional hour spent waiting for my name to be called out to submit the form, using languages and swears I never knew I could use, and almost landing in a hospital bed are all those things that made me realise that getting into NED is not child’s play. Hence, I have decided to let people know what it means to become a part of this institution. This is a step-by-step guide for all those who wish to apply to a university that still insists on using pre-historic administrative procedures. What you will need before you apply: -          A relative with a lot of free time on their hands to accompany you. -          Your own mode of conveyance. -          A relative who is a 17 grade or above government officer. -          Knowledge of a few regional languages. -          The ability to comprehend profanities and dish them out. -          Friends in high places or the ability to make friends instantaneously. -          Patience, stamina and of course, a large amount of money. Optional but highly recommended -          Health insurance Step 1: Getting ready Try to be one of the first applicants to acquire the prospectus from the university’s bank – the earlier, the better. Signup on the university’s website using the codes in the prospectus, fill in the online form and print it out along with the bank slips (chalans). Step 2: Paying the form submission fee Go to the university’s bank and submit the fee. Try submitting it as soon as admissions open. (Reaching the bank at a later date will mean encountering angry parents and students, along with very tired and frustrated bank employees.) There will be either a queue or a crowd when you reach the bank. In the case of a queue, you can either, 1) Stand in line and wait for your turn, which will take around 15 to 30 minutes. Or, 2) Go to the beginning of the queue and start complaining about the bank’s procedures. This may or may not result in your work getting done – but oh well, at least you tried. In case of a crowd, using option two will yield positive results faster. There is a higher chance of getting your turn early if you are a female. Your sister or mother may come in handy at this time. Step 3: Attestations You will need a few hundred documents attested. Put that grade-17 relative of yours to work. If you have done your A’ levels, visit the board office for an ‘equivalency’ certificate. The speed with which work gets done depends on your connections and your understanding of the word ‘fees’. Step 4: Submission of the form On any one of the submission dates, get up early, have a good breakfast (you’ll need all the strength you can get), ask your relative to join you, yup the same one with a lot of free time, and reach the admissions office a few hours before it opens. Collect a token, wait for your turn, submit your form, wait for a while more and then receive your admit card. Get in line as soon as possible. Take turns with your relative for standing in line. Make friends with those in front and those behind you. Be prepared to yell at people cutting in line, to be shoved and pushed. Once inside the office, follow the instructions from the token system. This entire ordeal may take around seven to ten hours, which is where your health insurance comes in. You may need it afterwards. Step 5: The test Study from your prior textbooks or join a centre for the test. Show up on the day of the test and just pass it (50 or above marks is a pass)! Step 6: Documents submission and medical test Utilise your government officer relative again. Get a PA (posterior-anterior)-view X-Ray report made. Arrange the required original documents and medical test fee. Reach the admissions office a few hours before time. Get a token, wait your turn and then submit the documents. Wait another 15 minutes. Receive a stamped and signed slip that says you have submitted them. Pay the medical test fee and receive a bank slip. Go to the medical centre. Get your height, weight, eyesight, colour blindness and X-Ray inspected in the fastest health check-up you will ever have witnessed. Receive a ‘thumbs up’ or the bad news that you cannot be a particular type of engineer because you are just a few centimetres short of the required height. Step 7: The interview Prepare by memorising your choices and arranging the admission fee. Show up at the designated time. (Everything will be delayed; you will not miss out on anything.) Walk to the auditorium, where the interviews are taking place, find a nice seat, sit down and just pray. There will be a projector displaying the merit list on a screen. Your position on the list determines your chances of realising your parents’ dreams. Wait for your name to be called out. Go to the bank employees and pay the fee. Receive the bank deposit slip and proceed to the university officials. The ‘interview’ will begin with the all-important question,

‘Have you paid the fee?’
Next will be,
‘Which department?’
Followed by,
‘Here.’
You will answer the first question by producing the bank deposit slip, the second by stating your choices and the third by taking the admission slip they offer. Leave. (Try not to look back) Tell your friends, yell enthusiastically and let the whole world revel in your happiness. You are now officially a student of NEDUET. Congratulations!

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